How I Role

Because it's been so long since I last posted, I will give this update...I am inadvertently growing corn in my flower bed. Last April, I was being a nice little green girl and planted some flower seeds on Earth Day. As they were sprouting, I noticed some other long, leafy something sprouting as well. Being the non-gardener type that I am, I thought perhaps another flower seed got mixed in with the one I planted. What I didn't think about, was the fact that I had been filling little bags with some corn feed near the same place they were coming up, around the same time I had planted the flower seeds. Long story short (or at least not so long), there are ears of corn just a week or two shy of harvesting--and we look like the biggest rednecks on our block!
So on a more serious note...I have spent a lot of time these last several months, mulling over an issue and I think it's time to blog about it more specifically. Every time I think about the fact that I carry the label to most people out there as a "pastor's wife", this bit of turmoil gets stirred up in me and I don't really know what to do with it. I've talked to friends, colleagues, other pastors, other pastor's wives, looking for that magic thing for them to say to me that will become my answer to the question, "What is my role?" For most of my life, I thought a pastor's wife should be the one that sits on the front row of every service, always has a smile, sings beautifully, heads up the women's ministry, and maybe even sells Home Interiors (honestly). But if you're like me, I don't want go to a church where the pastor's wife fills that description any more than I want to be that kind of person. So where does that leave me? You might be like me and wear about a million different hats--wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend, pastor's wife (my husband hates the phrase even more than I do). How do I give everything the right amount of focus? How do I keep from losing myself in all of this?
I am coming to terms with this one conclusion: this life is a journey, not a destination. The one role that trumps all others is being a Christ follower. The closer to Him I become, the closer to Amy I become. And, the more I lose myself to Him, the more I find myself. While I'll never be the perfect whatever (mother, friend, pastor's wife, etc), I know that as long as I keep my focus on Christ, the closer I'll be to that. My desire in any role or position I take in this life is to be genuine, sincere, kind, and helpful. Hopefully, I'm on my way.